Julie Delpy Magic

Julie Delpy joined us on this day in 1969.

A WALTZ FOR A NIGHT

Let me sing you a waltz

Out of nowhere, out of my thoughts

Let me sing you a waltz

About this one night stand

You were for me that night

Everything I always dreamt of in life

But now you're gone

You are far gone

All the way to your island of rain

It was for you just a one night thing

But you were much more to me

Just so you know

I hear rumors about you

About all the bad things you do

But when we were together alone

You didn't seem like a player at all

I don't care what they say

I know what you meant for me that day

I just wanted another try

I just wanted another night

Even if it doesn't seem quite right

You meant for me much more

Than anyone I've met before

One single night with you little Jesse

Is worth a thousand with anybody

I have no bitterness, my sweet

I'll never forget this one night thing

Even tomorrow, another arms

My heart will stay yours until I die

Let me sing you a waltz

Out of nowhere, out of my blues

Let me sing you a waltz

About this lovely one night stand

https://youtu.be/VhRkUhY8MlQ

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Trump obfuscates legit criticism of his relationship with Russia with his famous catchphrase, "Russia, Russia, Russia." That's his argument, haha.

Sure, sounds good! Except his own administration blames them too.

Pompeo- "Russia."

Barr- "Russia."

Intell- "Russia."

What's Trump's other catchphrase? "Maybe China, maybe China, maybe China!"

December 21, 2020

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If I owned Park City, every 15 minutes I'd have someone say over a loudspeaker, "Remember, as long as you're never down to your last $100, you can always spend $100 frivolously!"

December 21, 2019

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I need to reflect on that Star Wars movie for a little while. I did have a very strange revelation... somehow the character I relate to the most is C-3PO. The whole way through all of these new movies I think, "oh come on, what are the odds???"

December 21, 2019

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Hilarious! Trump's best speaking blunders of 2019.

https://youtu.be/UE9BXkQ-SRc

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I was watching Ellen DeGeneres Relatable on Netflix tonight and she told a story about seeing the mountain gorillas in Rwanda... and you know what, I did that, and it was relatable!

December 21, 2018

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In the spirit of bipartisanship, let's give Trump the $5 billion for his vanity wall. Might be worth the price tag to smash it to bits once he's no longer president. 

Or we could just invest $5 billion, or even more, in non-wall border security technology... a "figurative wall," if you will. 

Or we could spend $2.5 billion on wall technology and $2.5 billion on anti-ladder, anti-tunnel, anti-hole technology. 

Lot of options.

December 21, 2018

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Zuzu made her first joke. She pretended to pick something off me and said, "It's a bug." Then she pretended to eat it and laughed. Good one, but a bit worn out. Our monkey ancestors must have made that same joke millions of times.

December 21, 2017

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You know those dumb maps of the US that show it nearly totally red except for tiny pockets of blue, intending to show that nearly the whole country is for Trump- why do they think they can count all the space between the people??? Count the people instead! Mountain ranges, grassland and forests don't count!

December 21, 2016

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Isn't it weird that Trump seems more angry at losing the popular vote than happy at winning the electoral college vote? He hasn't seemed happy for a minute since the election. Maybe the only thing that makes him happy is being angry, having something to battle.

December 21, 2016

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William Bradford and the Mayflower Pilgrims landed on what is now known as Plymouth Rock in Plymouth, Massachusetts, on this day in 1620.

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We deported anarchist Emma Goldman to Russia on this day in 1919.

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On this day in 1795, two people bred the first Jack Russell. His name was... Jack Russell, and he went on to breed Jack Russell dogs.

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Monty Python, jumping the English channel, premiered on this day in 1969. 

https://youtube.com/shorts/VPqRuPItMrc

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Monty Python, Is there life after death? Premiered on this day in 1972.

https://youtu.be/2SIzmWolaFw

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Hall of Famer Josh Gibson was born on this day in 1911. Few know him, but he may have been the best baseball player of all time.

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Jane Fonda was born on this day in 1937. Here she is with her father Henry at the 1957 Venice International Film Festival.

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Ray Romano joined us on this day in 1957.

"Does anybody know how long a mayfly lives? 24 hours. Imagine one at lunch already having a midlife crisis. If you die before that, it's a tragedy. He had his whole day ahead of him."

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Pitcher Roger McDowell joined us on this day in 1960.

RM- "My typical order at McDonald's is two quarter pounders with cheese, a Big Mac, a fish sandwich, two cheeseburgers, a large order of french fries, a large iced tea, a vanilla milkshake and a piece of cherry pie."

Interviewer: "Why only one order of french fries?"

RM- "I need to save room for the cherry pie."

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Other notable birthdays- Samuel L Jackson (1948), Andy Dick (1965)

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General George S. Patton left us on this day in 1945. I'll be damned if his speech to The Third Army isn't one of the greatest, most inspiring speeches in human history.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_S._Patton%27s_speech_to_the_Third_Army

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Bruce McCandless left us on this day in 2017. He was the first person to float completely untethered, with nothing but his Manned Maneuvering Unit keeping him alive. So hard to imagine that both he and the shuttle are traveling like 10,000 mph, or something crazy like that.

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Notable deathdays- Thomas the Apostle (AD 72), Ted Healy (1937), F. Scott Fitzgerald (1940)

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CNN- Trump denies Gingrich claim that he’s dropping ‘drain the swamp’

I'm sure he's replacing it with "fill the swamp."

http://cnn.it/2hV2i4n

December 21, 2016

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McSweeney's- YUB JUB MEANS “DEVOUR THE WEAK”: AN AUTHORITATIVE STUDY OF EWOKS, FROM THE FIELD NOTES OF DAVO ATTEN-BORU AND PLADDO CARDIGUN, EXO-NATURALISTS by DANIEL McARDLE

Finally, a scientific study of Ewok culture.

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/yub-jub-means-devour-the-weak-an-authoritative-study-of-ewoks-from-the-field-notes-of-davo-atten-boru-and-pladdo-cardigun-exo-naturalists

December 21, 2019

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McSweeney's- IF SAM WAINWRIGHT SAYS “HEE-HAW” ONE MORE TIME, I’M GOING TO FUCKING SNAP by STEPHEN RUDDY

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/if-sam-wainwright-says-hee-haw-one-more-time-im-going-to-fucking-snap

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The Atlantic- Engaging With Trump’s Die-Hard Supporters Isn’t Productive

Huh. This is the same argument Richard Dawkins uses to not debate creationists.

"Instead [of talking about all of his voters], I am talking about the people who are giving Trump their full-throated support to the very end, even as he mulls a military coup; the people who buy weird paintings of Trump crossing the Delaware, or who believe that Trump is an agent of Jesus Christ, or who think that Trump is fighting a blood-drinking ring of pedophiles. These supporters have gone far beyond political loyalty and have succumbed to a kind of mass delusion. It is not possible to engage them. Indeed, to argue with them is to legitimize their beliefs, which itself is unhealthy for our democracy."

https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2020/12/we-no-longer-need-to-engage-with-trumps-die-hard-supporters/617449/

December 21, 2020

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The Hill- Pat Robertson says Trump lives in ‘alternate reality’ and Biden will be president

It's like I always say, listen to Pat Robertson. Wait, no, that has always been awful advice.

http://hill.cm/KgAed5N

December 21, 2020

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Ronnie Chieng- "The internet is making people so fucking stupid. Who knew that all of human knowledge could make people dumber?"

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Theophrastus- "Waste of time is the most extravagant and costly of all expenses."

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Hicks- "I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck."

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Steven Wright:

I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'

Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.

Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, "Do I know you?

When I was a fetus, I used to sneak out at night when my mother was sleeping. I figured I should start stealing stuff while I still had no fingerprints.

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving.

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Steinbeck- "When two people meet, each one is changed by the other so you've got two new people."

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Woody Allen- "What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet."

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Hitchens- "It matters not what you think, but how you think.”

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Arthur C. Clarke- "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."

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Vonnegut, Cat's Cradle- "Science is magic that works."

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Julie Delpy as Celine, Before Sunrise- "I believe if there's any kind of God it wouldn't be in any of us, not you or me but just this little space in between. If there's any kind of magic in this world it must be in the attempt of understanding someone sharing something. I know, it's almost impossible to succeed but who cares really? The answer must be in the attempt."