I'm Rich!
Man, this really strikes me as one of those key Trump details that can't be forgotten. It turns out he's a bible salesman! (For God's sake.) On a financial disclosure required for seeking federal employment, he listed that he made $300,000 from selling bibles. I mean, come on, that's the quintessential grifter move!
The bible site says, “Yes, this is the only Bible endorsed by President Trump!” Normal bibles cost $60, but they also sell bibles signed by Trump, for $1,000 of course.
Look at all the lies he tells, and compare them with the truths. When he admits to selling bibles for $300,000 profit, it makes one wonder if his truths might be worse then his lies!
I get it, I get it, people like him because he gives billionaires tax breaks that should trickle down to everyday people like us. They don't like him for his god-awful personality. No, of course not. But I wonder if it's possible that his tax breaks for billionaires policy is just another grift. No, it couldn't be. Certainly he has more class than that.
Seriously though, even his most ardent supporter would not have been able to tell you if this was an actual article or a joke article. THAT is why the guy is seen as the joke throughout the world, and finally 100% of us can relate. If one can't tell whether or not this story is a joke, again, the story where the billionaire made $300,000 selling bibles to everyday people, many of whom think that he was anointed by God, that alone is a joke in itself.
When I was telling Gretel the basics of this story she said it reminded her of Paper Moon! One of my favorite films, I could watch it any night. It's the story of Moses Pray and maybe-his-daughter driving through the Midwest pulling bible salesman scams on unsuspecting victims.
The definition of a paper moon is something fake, deceptive, or illusory. Sounds like Trump himself.
Criterion just announced yesterday when this story came out that they are releasing a Paper Moon blu-ray in November. The Maysles Brothers documentary Salesman, the real life story of devious bible salesmen, is already part of the Criterion Collection.
This is a ubiquitous story, and I'm sure you can find the equivalent in every culture throughout the world, all throughout history, and the bible salesman is never the hero. I'm due to watch both of those films again.
August 16, 2024
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Nothing to see here....only the daily Trump thing that would have ended any other politician's career. When the head of the VFW calls your comments "asinine," doesn't that disqualify you? This guy exposes his true morally bankrupt self every single day.
The Hill- Veterans of Foreign Wars blasts Trump’s statement as ‘asinine’
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Zuzu asked me this morning what we would buy if we were rich. I told her that a very important writer named Henry David Thoreau said that a person is rich in proportion to the number of things they can afford to do without. Then I told her that if we happened to get rich though, we'd buy a bigger house.
August 16, 2022
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Watch out for these two.
August 16, 2020
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Strange how people ignore recommendations from independent institutions, instead opting to rely on a friend's opinion or a cherry-picked expert, both of which are really just pretenses to affirm their own preconceived notions. They believe the concensus of those who have dedicated their lives to solving a problem is meaningless next to the first thing that popped into their head, that a lifetime of study and experiment is garbage next to their meandering thought.
August 16, 2021
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The Bukowski poem that Bukowski might want us to read on his 100th birthday, today.
when Wagner was an
old man
a birthday party was given
in his
honor
and a couple of
youthful
incidental compositions
were played.
afterwards
he asked,
"who wrote those?"
"you did," he was
told.
"ah," he responded,
"it's as I have always
suspected: death
then
does have some
virtue."
August 16, 2020
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Did anybody see that ridiculous sign that somebody's holding up at the Phillies game? "IT SHITTIN' SEASON." It's either that or, "ITS HITTIN' SEASON." I guess we'll have to wait to see how the rest of the season goes before we know which one is most appropriate.
August 16, 2019
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How is it that it isn't nice to bully, but it's 100% appropriate to bully bullies? And yes, this does have to do with the second fattest president.
August 16, 2019
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George Harrison mortgaged his house and put up all $4.5 million needed for Monty Python to make the Life of Brian. When asked why he did it he responded, "because I wanted to see the movie."
August 16, 2019
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Zuzu said there are two kids named Miles in her class. I told her that was about 3.2 kilometers, but she didn't get it.
August 16, 2018
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It's funny how the times change, isn't it? I used to get done with racquetball, dead tired, and drive home listening to some great poem on The Writer's Almanac. But then Garrison Keillor retired, and now I drive home just thinking about him molesting people.
August 16, 2018
*I love Garrison Keillor and don't know anything about the allegations.
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I'm filling the empty spot the Daily Show left by catching up on the last year of John Oliver's show. John discussed appropriate chimp names with Jane Goodall, which culminated in one of my all-time favorite sentences:
John- "Poo-throw Hitler is an amazing name for a chimp."
Jane- "Fantastic."
http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/john-oliver-jane-goodall
August 16, 2015
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If our eyes were vertical instead of horizontal, would mirrors reverse up and down instead of left and right?
August 16, 2014
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Is it hard to hook up a new toilet? I tried to fix ours but I completely destroyed it.
August 16, 2009
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British colonel, diplomat, writer and archaeologist, T. E. Lawrence, joined us on this day in 1888.
"All men dream: but not equally, Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dream with open eyes, to make it possible."
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On this day in 1974, The Ramones played their very first public concert at CBGB
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Eydie Gormé left us on this day in 2013.
BLAME IT ON THE BOSSA NOVA
I was at a dance when he caught my eye
Standin' all alone lookin' sad and shy
We began to dance, swayin' to and fro
And soon I knew I'd never let him go
Blame it on the bossa nova with its magic spell
Blame it on the bossa nova that he did so well
Oh, it all began with just one little dance
But soon it ended up a big romance
Blame it on the bossa nova
The dance of love
No, no, the bossa nova
(Or the stars above?)
No, no, the bossa nova
(Now was it the tune?)
Yeah, yeah, the bossa nova
(The dance of love)
Now, I'm glad to say I'm his bride to be
And we're gonna raise a family
And when our kids ask how it came about
I'm gonna say to them without a doubt
Blame it on the bossa nova with its magic spell
Blame it on the bossa nova that he did so well
Oh, it all began with just one little dance
But soon it ended up a big romance
Blame it on the bossa nova
The dance of love
No, no, the bossa nova
(Or the stars above?)
No, no, the bossa nova
(Now was it the tune?)
Yeah, yeah, the bossa nova
(The dance of love)
No, no, the bossa nova
(Or the stars above?)
No, no, the bossa nova
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Outlaw country music star and Norm Macdonald's friend, Billy Joe Shaver, was born on this day in 1939. Norm Macdonald had him on his show, Norm Macdonald Has a Show. Here's what Norm told him.
“People hate country. And sometimes people go like, ‘Ah country music, it’s just your dog died, and your wife left you, and you’re a drunk.’ And I’m like, ‘Well, it’s life.'”
Norm Macdonald said this to Billy Bob Thornton years ago:
“My dream is to be a country music writer. So I write all this country music. And then once … I’m friends with Billy Joe Shaver, and I wrote … it took me like two weeks to write this song to send to him. And then I didn’t send it. Because his songs are so fuckin’ good, and then I felt weird sending this graffiti over to him. I cowarded out.”
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Madonna was born on this day in 1958 when Ricky Nelson's Poor Little Fool was at the top of the charts. I can't explain it, one time I saw the video for Like a Prayer and it was like a religious experience. I had such connection to it. Unexplainable. It was stuck in my head for ages.
LIKE A PRAYER
Life is a mystery
Everyone must stand alone
I hear you call my name
And it feels like home
When you call my name it's like a little prayer
I'm down on my knees, I wanna take you there
In the midnight hour I can feel your power
Just like a prayer you know I'll take you there
I hear your voice
It's like an angel sighing
I have no choice, I hear your voice
Feels like flying
I close my eyes
Oh God I think I'm falling
Out of the sky, I close my eyes
Heaven help me
When you call my name it's like a little prayer
I'm down on my knees, I wanna take you there
In the midnight hour I can feel your power
Just like a prayer you know I'll take you there
Like a child
You whisper softly to me
You're in control just like a child
Now I'm dancing
It's like a dream
No end and no beginning
You're here with me it's like a dream
Let the choir sing
When you call my name it's like a little prayer
I'm down on my knees, I wanna take you there
In the midnight hour I can feel your power
Just like a prayer you know I'll take you there
When you call my name it's like a little prayer
I'm down on my knees, I wanna take you there
In the midnight hour I can feel your power
Just like a prayer you know I'll take you there
Life is a mystery
Everyone must stand alone
I hear you call my name
And it feels like home
Just like a prayer, your voice can take me there
Just like a muse to me, you are a mystery
Just like a dream, you are not what you seem
Just like a prayer, no choice your voice can take me there
Just like a prayer, I'll take you there
It's like a dream to me
Just like a prayer, I'll take you there
It's like a dream to me
Just like a prayer, I'll take you there
It's like a dream to me
Just like a prayer, I'll take you there
It's like a dream to me
Just like a prayer, your voice can take me there
Just like a muse to me, you are a mystery
Just like a dream, you are not what you seem
Just like a prayer, no choice your voice can take me there
Just like a prayer, your voice can take me there
Just like a muse to me, you are a mystery
Just like a dream, you are not what you seem
Just like a prayer, no choice your voice can take me there
Your voice can take me there
Like a prayer
Just like a prayer
Just like a prayer, your voice can take me there
Just like a prayer
Just like a prayer, your voice can take me there
...
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Steve Carell was born on this day in 1962 when The Beverly Hillbillies was the top rated show.
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Robert Johnson left us on this day in 1938.
ME AND THE DEVIL
Early this morning
When you knocked upon my door
Early this morning
When you knocked upon my door
And I say, "Hello, Satan"
I believe, it's time to go
Me and the devil
Walking side by side
Me and the devil
Walking side by side
And I'm gonna see my woman
'Til I get satisfied
See see, you don't see why
Like you'a dog me 'round
Say, I don't see why
People dawging me around
Must be that old evil spirit
Drop me down in your ground
You may bury my body
Down by the highway side
You may bury my body
Down by the highway side
So my old evil spirit
Can greyhound bus that ride
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Babe Ruth left us in 1948.
"How to hit home runs: I swing as hard as I can, and I try to swing right through the ball...The harder you grip the bat, the more you can swing it through the ball, and the farther the ball will go. I swing big, with everything I've got. I hit big or I miss big. I like to live as big as I can."
The Sandlot: "Babe Ruth was the greatest baseball player that ever lived. I mean, people say he's less than a God, but more than a man. Like Hercules or something."
Graffiti Seen in New York"Babe Ruth struck out 1330 times."
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Bela Lugosi left us on this day in 1956.
"I guess I'm pretty much of a lone wolf. I don't say I don't like people at all but, to tell you the truth I only like it then if I have a chance to look deep into their hearts and their minds."
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Elvis Presley somehow left us on this day in 1977, if that's possible. My great-grandma's favorite singer. I was shocked when I realized that she was like 40 when he became popular. She was 15 when she was pregnant with my grandma, so she never had a childhood. When her children were mostly grown, I guess she decided to become a teenager.
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On this day in 1920, Ray Chapman of the Cleveland Indians was hit in the head with a fastball thrown by Carl Mays of the New York Yankees, and he died early the next day. Chapman was the second player to die from injuries sustained in a Major League Baseball game, the first being Doc Powers in 1909.
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Another notable birthday- Taika Waititi (1974)
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Other notable deathdays- Idi Amin (2003), Aretha Franklin (2018)
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On this day in 2013, a crime was committed against the city of Philadelphia when the Phillies fired Charlie Manuel.
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Did you know Errol Morris abandoned a movie he intended to make comparing Donald Trump to Charles Foster Kane? Would have been a doozy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upC8pX3RY0A
August 16, 2015
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Alternet- The Trump Self-Sabotage Campaign
I believe it... it's the only thing that makes sense after the purple heart thing, the Khan family thing, and the assassinate Hillary Clinton thing. But I'm not discounting the possibility that he's a lunatic. At the very least he doesn't care one bit if he wins. But he can't be branded a loser or a quitter. He's not studying anything, and he's planting seeds to get out of the debates. Some very interesting things are going to happen!
http://www.alternet.org/election-2016/trump-self-sabotage-campaign
August 16, 2016
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There's the liberal media again, reporting... wait, what? Reporting what high-profile Republicans are saying about Trump? (Read the first page of the letter... damning!)
"Deliberately and repeatedly lying about scores of issues, large and small."
http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/read-gop-open-letter-urging-rnc-to-cut-off-funding-to-trump-w434687
August 16, 2016
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Peter Fonda is gone, but anybody who's ever looked at their watch, tossed it on the ground, and rode off on a motorcycle while Born to Be Wild played... well they won't be forgotten for a while.
Easy Rider marked a generational shift from old-time Hollywood to modern Hollywood. My favorite old-time Hollywood film is My Darling Clementine, starring Henry Fonda as Wyatt Earp. Easy Rider of course stars Peter Fonda, also named Wyatt. While Henry's Wyatt is traveling west, Peter's Wyatt travels east... he did not get along with his dad early on, but later they made amends.
He found his own way.
His family's statement concluded: "In honor of Peter, please raise a glass to freedom."
https://youtu.be/mAxYA381dB8
August 16, 2019
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50 Of The Creepiest Things Kids Have Ever Said To Their Parents
I have had multiple miscarriages.
My daughter: I met your babies that died, in my dream. They want you to know that you're a good mom.
And...
My daughter was three, and I was getting her ready for the day. She had been waking up with nightmares almost every night for a month or two. I asked what she wanted for breakfast, and she told me she wanted to share it with the dead baby in her closet. I thought she meant one of her dolls, but when I pulled them out, she said "no, not a doll, the dead one that sleeps on the closet floor at night."
God damn!
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For how much this guy talks about other people's looks...
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Anthony Bourdain- "Within months of leaving the professional kitchen for what turned out to be a non-stop voyage around the world, I found myself in the Mekong delta sitting down and getting hammered with a group of former VC. The senior member of the group was a very old dude, who when I asked if he felt any animosity towards me, towards my country, why he was being so damned nice, laughed in my face and started ticking off all the other countries he’d fought in his time: Chinese, French, Japanese, Cambodians, Chinese again. He basically said, “don’t flatter yourself that you were anything special–now drink!”"
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John Ciardi- "There's nothing wrong with sobriety in moderation."
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Lao Tze- "A country is never so poor as when it is seemed to be filled with riches."
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Socrates- "When the debate is lost, insults become the losers tool."
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William Goldman, The Princess Bride- "There have been five great kisses since 1642 B.C...(before then couples hooked thumbs.) And the precise rating of kisses is a terribly difficult thing, often leading to great controversy.... Well, this one left them all behind."
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William Blake, The Marriage of Heaven and Hell- "The man who never alters his opinion is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind."
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Steve Martin- "We've had some fun tonight...considering we're all gonna die someday."
Addendum
Moe, Larry, Curly, the Executive Branch and... ???
Don't know if you've heard this or not, but a recent Zogby poll showed that 74% of Americans can name the Three Stooges, but only 42% can name the three branches of government.
http://sg.news.yahoo.com/060814/3/42sfg.html
That certainly answers my question of why so few care about the erosion of the system of checks and balances! Checks and balances??? Whoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoop. (I'm on my side on the floor, running in circles.)
Now if I could only find a defense for these metaphorical eye-gouges my government keeps giving me.
Incidentally, Lee Atwater (who was essentially the first George Bush's Karl Rove) had a something of a deathbed conversion away from his brand of conservatism, saying that society needs "a little heart, a lot of brotherhood." I not sure if that redeems him or not because he was dying of a brain tumor and also said this: "In 1943, Curly of the Three Stooges farted in this same bed." And's that's no joke.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/style/longterm/books/bckgrnd/atwater.htm
This has been your daily lesson on the cosmic interconnection of the the tragedy of errors and the comedy of terrors.
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